Wednesday, December 08, 2004

More momma wisdom

You be the judge:

Scene: Dinner table, my mother is watching Korean soap operas and I'm shelling and eating peanuts.

Mom: Oh, your lawyer called me today. (Note to reader: This would be the very FObish first generation lawyer that is working on my apartment purchase.)
Me: He called you? What for?
Mom: He wanted to know if you were single or dating anyone?
Me: He called you? Isn't he married?
Mom: Oh, he wasn't calling for himself, he was calling for his brother-in-law?
Me: Not interested.
Mom: You haven't even heard me out.
Me: Not interested.
Mom: But he's a dentist...practically a doctor.
Me: Not interested.
Mom: But you haven't even seen a picture of him.
Me: Have you?
Mom: No, but he's a dentist...and Korean...and he's not too old.
Me: Was he born here?
Mom: Well...not exactly.
Me: When did he come?
Mom: I think in this twenties.
Me: ...
Mom: Apparantely the lawyer was really impressed with you...he said you were pretty and smart and well spoken.
Me: Still not interested.
Mom: And his brother-in-law is now very interested in you too. They think it is very impressive that a woman of your age would be taking on the responsibility of buying an apartment.
Me: Still not interested.
Mom: I bet the lawyer would waive his fees if you went out on a date with his brother-in-law.
Me: Thanks you are prostituting me out for free legal services. (Note to reader: Although at $1750 in fees, I'd be a pretty expensive and ritzy prostitute.)
Mom: But he wants to meet you...when was the last time a guy wanted to meet you?
Me: Thanks for the encouragement.
Mom: Aigu! (Korean mother sound) What am I going to do with you?

At this point I took my peanuts and headed into the basement. Yeah, I really need to close on the apartment and move out ASAP. I found my Mom snooping through my purse the other day. I suspect she was looking for a business card and trying to steal my email address. Ah, thank god my parents are computer illiterate.


ned said...

You are too adorable! Good luck with the dilemma (that's tomorrow, right?) - just play off the whole thing very casually and everything will be alright! Right?? =)

foo said...

I like laughing out loud. Mission accomplished, Bo. Mission accomplished.

klo said...

You are fabulous! Ah! Mothers! They mean well but dear god do they know how to push the buttons!