Friday, September 29, 2006

Dear John Part II (apologies for the profanity but sometimes it's appropriate)

Dear September 2006,

I've never had to dump a whole month before so this is new for me. Please bear with me.

Okay, here we go...

We are F*****G through. That's can take your m*****f*****g 30 days, and autumnal equinox, and changing leaves, and stick em where the sun don't shine.

You'd think that being kidnapped and robbed would be plenty for one month...but had to go and throw in being very unceremoniously dumped by your boyfriend to make it all the more fun. And over email no less. What the heck was up with that?! At least you could of had him pick up the phone or something. And what's the deal with the non-response to my calls and emails. That's like rubbing hydrochloric acid into my wounds. Skip the salt.

And while starting a new job is a very good thing, I'm still blaming you for the stress brought on by the newness of it all. If I get a new gray hear because of you, I'm gonna bop you.

Yeah, yeah...there was the whole triathlon, not drowning thing. But that's chump change pal. You're just lucky I've got a good sense of humor or I'd of ditched you somewhere around the 16th of the month.

So grab your bags and don't let the door hit your arse on the way out. I'm shacking up with Oct.

Cordially yours,


Michelle said...

Wow, Bo. You've had it pretty rough this month. Let's hope October is better. Think of it this way- at least you didn't get dumped via Post-It note a la Carrie from Sex in the City! I'm not worried about you getting over this guy who didn't have the decency to tell you to your face. I'm worried for all the single men in NYC!

tony rutt said...


Here's the antedote, and I e-mailed you about this over the weekend. Go see Madness play tonight in Trbeca! Debbie has joked that if I'm not home this evening it will be because I've flown to NYC.

Oh, and his loss is the gain of every red-blooded boy in NYC!