Friday, January 21, 2005

Nightmares

Nightmares are odd things. They are not real but they often have the ability to psychologically scar you in ways that reality cannot. I don't have nightmares often , for better or worse. It seems that what I lack in frequency my mind makes up for in intensity. Last night I had a nightmare, the first in nearly 6 or 7 months, maybe even longer. And I woke up screaming at 4:30AM. Of course, the sudden wakefullness resulted in the lingering memory of nearly every detail.

My nightmares are different from Hollywood's cliched depiction of the dream world. I'm not chased by faceless bandits or confronted by hidious monsters. My nightmares are always rooted in the obscenely normal world of errands and deadlines and appointment to chat with a friend over coffee. Car accidents, false accusations, misunderstandings, misplaced trust, deception...it's like dreaming up my own mini-soap opera. The mimicing of reality may be the reason why my nightmares often influence the operating of my cognizant, wakeful mind.

I woke up this morning achy and tired...and I'm not sure if this is a result of the nightmare or the mystery sickness that I've been fighting off all week.

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